How can I make money this summer??? And “get a job” isn’t a valid response.

J.Q. Monkey

Dear J.Q. Monkey:

This is one question that I’m sure millions of people would like to have an answer for. It’s not an easy question to answer. However, the Great Wimble is here for that.

In order to answer this question, we must first determine what you mean by a “job”. It’s difficult to determine what is a job, and what isn’t a job. To make the decision easier, I’m going to define “job” as something that involves work. That eliminates quite a few possibilities. Selling drugs involves work. You could sell yourself on the streets, but yet that involves work too. You could start your own Internet business, but that involves work as well. Hmm, I’m almost out of ideas here.

OH WAIT!!! I’ve got one more!

There is only one real way to make money, and not have to get a job. Here’s how it works:

The first thing you do, is get out of bed. Then, you hop in your car, drive to Grandma’s house, and say “Grammy, I love you, do you realize how much I love you? I love you SOOO much, that I decided I’m going to spend the rest of the summer with you.” Then, after she agrees that it’s going to be a great idea, you move in. Then, as time goes by, she begins to realize that it wasn’t the best idea. Why? Because ever since you moved in, you began being as annoying as possible. Then, after a month or so, a week if you’re lucky, she’ll be more than happy to pay you to leave her alone for the rest of the summer.

Obviously you could substitute Grandma for any other rich (or semi-rich) relative that you have.

Hope that works out for ya J.Q. Have a great summer!

Wimble

When are you going to get a job? Hmmmm?

Mom

Dear Mother-Dearest,

You know, some people may think about this question a lot. However, me, being the great, mighty Wimble does not have to ever even consider this question. I would give you a straight up answer… but that’s rather boring. So, let’s look at it this way:

Let’s see… What good is a job?

Money!!!
Experience
Money!!!
Ok, that’s all for that… Now, what are the downsides of a job?

Little free time
Jobs are never “fun”
Have to do what your told
Bosses are always A-holes…
Ok.. I’ll stop there before it gets outta hand… Now, when you compare the ups and downs, the only real benefit of a job is the money, correct? Ok, now that that’s agreed upon, let’s talk about Money…

Money, of course, can have its benefits… but does it really bring happiness? NO… Sure, with money I’ll be able to go out and buy everything I’ve ever wanted, but will I be happy with that?? (ok, maybe, but that’s beside the fact). However, with money comes the fact that I SHOULD save it… Question here is, why save money? Just to let it set there while you stare at it drooling as you ponder everything you could possibly buy with that money…

Ok, I’ll stop there… I think I got a little off topic, so let me get back on track. When will I get a job? I’m always working. Sure, I may not get paid for some of the work I do, and a lot of the work I do may not ever accomplish anything, but I still work. This webpage is work, and it’s fun work.. (maybe there is a correlation between not getting paid and work being fun…. HMMMM).

So there’s your answer… I, the Great Wimble, already have a job, or two, or three, etc… Hope I was able to help.

Wimble